Stories

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I suppose categorizing was a natural. Animals go in zoos. I would have had to create subject topics, like religion, politics, personal behavior, manners, morality and such. This was essential to group related information so that related things could be compared to one another. It also created a clarity of mind, such that one detaches unrelated concepts like church and state, where for instance, if one confuses secular government with religion or God's law, one will probably never have a clear understanding of either, but only a confusion of mind.

I began to realize I did not possess true definitions for anything, no real understanding. I began to try to define things, like love, hate, good, bad, truth, sacrifice, honor or mercy. Love is x. Emotion is x. What is x ? such that I began trying to define the meaning of every term I was trying to use in the answers. 'Why' is the absence of reason. Reason is cause. Cause is x. Is means equals. Love equals x. Love does not equal hate. Hate equals 'screw you'. I began to get into the feelings of it. Humans are not some definition. Humans are how do I feel about them. Not good. I free-associated feeling and emotion. I tried to trace the sentiment to the source and origin of experience by revisiting my past.

His aunt shot herself in the mouth with a shotgun on his bed, pulling the trigger with her toe. He showed me some brains still left on the wall. How bad is that and he was still sleeping there. Came a time when he said to me, "I don't give a schmuck, screw them, they don't give a whit about me. From now on, I am out for myself".

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