Stories
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It was when it occurred to me that my heart could not be free, that I realized that the operation of all reality was based on absolute repetitive behavior. My heart could not be free. It had to beat without break without vacation without doubt. There could be no freedom for my heart. I decided that the very condition of freedom was based on absolutely non-free repetitive behavior. Freedom was made possible by order, and without order no freedom could be possible.
I changed my mind; I needed to change my body. I would of course, now and then notice, that I did things I did not like. I realized I had conditioned behavior which was automatic and unconscious. Other people might notice but I would not. I decided to try to catch myself doing things I no longer wanted to do. I would try to catch myself in the act. If I was going to have control of myself, I would need to be aware of what I did.
Automatic conditioning was necessary. The analogy I used was, if I couldn't tie my shoe-laces automatically, I would have to concentrate on it every time. The automatic processes allowed one to do, two or more things at the same time, which is to say - walk and chew gum. So the idea was to discover what the automatic processes were and how they controlled me. If I was to be conscious-controlling, I would need to discover what automatic processes controlled me, that were automatic and unconscious.
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